Long-term relationships can be hard work at the best of times, so it’s really no surprise that romance suffers sooner or later. As the novelty of a relationship wears off, it can be all too easy to fall into routines which kill off the excitement and rush of the heady, early days. The following is a list of five things you can do to reignite the spark.
1. Discover something new about your partner
This can be something small or major, related to sex, or something else entirely. Learning at least one new thing about your partner allows both of you to feel like there is still scope for growth and novelty in your relationship, just as things would have been when you were embarking on it. Remember that this is a two-way activity: you will need to reveal something new about yourself too.
2. Go on a date
If you’re anything at all like most people in a long-term relationship, then you probably haven’t been going out all that much. Choose a date with your partner and stick to it—go to a restaurant, the movies, a bar, whatever you feel would rekindle the spark. You have to be serious about it too: look forward to it, dress up, and generally try to recreate the feelings you had on dates in the early days.
3. Make some together time
This is an important one, especially if both you and your partner have busy working lives or have kids. Time together is vital to keeping the romance alive, and for it to work properly it needs to really be time alone—no outside interference at all. .That means putting away phones and laptops, and just enjoying each other’s company.
4. Be open
It’s important to be open and honest with your partner on an emotional level. Opening up about your feelings can help you both to rediscover some of the passion lost over time, particularly if you have fallen into a routine of casual, emotionally safe conversation. Set aside some time to have a deep conversation with your partner, and think about setting the mood with candlelight and other romantic effects.
5. Make time for sex
This one might seem obvious, but a surprising number of couples really let their sex lives suffer over the course of their relationships. As the initial rush of sexual attraction fades, it becomes more difficult to make time for genuine, passionate sex. As sex is perhaps one of the most important aspects of any romantic relationship, it is crucial to keep the physical side of things exciting. If you allocate enough time during the week for sex, you might learn new things about your partner, yourself, and each other.
There are literally hundreds of other things you could try to reawaken the romance in your relationship. As long as both you and your partner are committed to reviving your romance, and are aware of each other’s needs and limitations, you’re bound to find something that will work. Best of luck!